So today is day 30. And I am supposed to be reading Exodus 5-8 and Psalms 1:1-19. But I am going to be honest, I don't really want to. I keep looking at the clock, I keep wanting to be done, I keep...not focusing. And I don't feel like I am in the right ... mindset? Maybe that is just an excuse. But I can't concentrate on what I am supposed to be reading, and I want to go to sleep.
But there is something on my heart.
Tonight at prayer meeting, the topic was forgiveness. And we sang a song called "You are My Peace". It was a beautiful song, that is lulling me to sleep. Reminding me that God is my peace. And maybe he would be frustrated that I can't give him 30 minutes to focus on my Bible reading, or maybe he would understand. God has so many different characteristics, so many different ways of responding. But this is what I do know, he loves me, and he "gets" me.
So I am going to go to sleep. And I am going to come back to day 30 tomorrow.
But then I think, what if God came tonight? Would I regret not taking the time to know him better?
Why is life so complicated! Why don't we have all the answers!
I am going to sleep.
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